KILL IT

KILL IT NOW ©Agbenyo Yao E.A.R November 2012 Copyright © Agbenyo Yao E.A.R, November 2012. ISBN:1456768795387429 All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical whether by photocopy, recording or any information storage and retrieval system without prior permission of the author. All correspondence should be forwarded to the author: YOUTH AND FUTURE INC. Box TT191, Tema. Email: hon.agbenyo@ymail.com yaoagbenyo@gmail.com +233274864449 DEDICATED TO MY SENIOR BROTHER MR. AGBENYO DANIEL AND HIS WIFE SISTER MATILDA APREKU (MRS. AGBENYO) AND ALL THE PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF THEIR DREAMS AND VISIONS. ACKNOWLEDGMENT Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee And before thou camest forth out of the womb, I sanctified thee and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations…be not afraid…for I am with thee sayeth the Lord. I thank my God Almighty Jehovah, his son Jesus Christ of Nazareth who died to save me from eternal damnation, and my blessed Holy Spirit for teaching me to write this book too, at last another one has been published HALLELUUUUUUUIAH. God bless all my lecturers at the University Of Education and all my teachers, the first being my mum, Madam Grace A. Amegah and all who have impacted my life till now especially pastor Alex Qayson of DCLM, Tema and Mr. Agbodzi Moses who returned me to school. Wise Dogbevia and Philip Amegagoe have been so helpful financially. God bless Mr. Francis Yao Dawson for his numerous support and encouragement. God bless my brothers and sisters; Mr. Agbenyo Daniel K and sister Dora for paying my fees till now, hon. Oliver Agbenyo-Ahiafor and sister Ruthvera cannot be forgotten but the family is more than extended, stay blessed. My gratitude to all the writers whose works I have been reading since I knew to read, I must say I gathered many ideas from them. And YOU! For purchasing. Or else I should be writing for no one. God bless you for the encouragement and support. Please help me bring out better books by sending any criticisms to: hon.agbenyo@ymail.com. TO ALL MY YOUTHFUL GENIUSES; “IN EXCELLENCE, YOU HAVE A SHARE GO FOR IT!!! FOREWORD Whether young or old, male or female, whatever our profession, whatever our faith and or beliefs we have all at least once in a life time come to a particular point where we feel that this is my time to do as I had wanted. Today is my right time to do as I had wanted. The secret admirer has once upon a time felt a particular moment that this is the right time to say it just as I feel. The evangelist has met it on his missions, the student has encountered it in his studies, the teacher, in the classroom, the laborer, the doctor, the farmer, the counselor, the mother, the guardian and the musician. The preacher, the drunkard, the broker, the lover and the grape vine. The Buddhist, the Christian, the Muslim and the Traditionalist. WE ALL HAVE AT LEAST ONCE IN A LIFE TIME FELT: this is my moment. We all have once in a life time known that feeling when something stirs within us and we know that a unique opportunity now available to us may never return to us the same way. Pathetically and sadly enough, we must genuinely say that we mostly let those moments slip by. We miss our moments only to cry, weep and curse later; “had I known”. Then it’s too late to repair. Psychologists tell us that if we do not act immediately we have this kind of feeling, we are less likely to act later when such moments present themselves. Each time we fail to act, we become more closed, more hardened, more desensitized, more emotionally paralysed. We are not able to detect and react to other such moments. We mostly trick and deceive ourselves by substituting emotions for actions. When we are prompted to pray for a friend, donate to a charity, help a needy girl or help that boy go to school, or giving the aged some helping hand, or appreciating what someone has done or telling someone how great you feel around him or her, rather than taking immediate action, we ignore that feeling thinking well that takes care of itself, I don’t have time now, later, or tomorrow or may be a better time will come next time. Some even say whatever will be, will be, someone else will do it and many more discouraging words and reasons for which we cannot act immediately. We deceive ourselves thereby closing ourselves to more opportunities. This book has been carefully written to help you gain a better understanding of the world around you and to discover your purpose for existence and how to live a fulfilled life. My sincerest prayer and hope is that you make the best out of this book. GOD BLESS YOU. EPISODE ONE Let’s start with a poem I presented at the convocation of students of English in the University of Education, Winneba. I call it the tragedy of not trying at all. YEN BO BIO Agbenyo Yao E.A.R. We drown in a river not by falling in but remaining there in. The tragedy of life is not that we die but that many people reach the point of death only to realize that they had never really lived. Once you’ve cared for none, and lived for none and worked for none and sacrificed for none but self and I, dearly beloved you’ve never lived. Once you fail to try and fail to risk and fail to dare in life, dearly beloved you’ve never lived. The tragedy of life is not that we die but that things die in men while yet they live. Somewhere along the way of life you might feel hurt or disappointed, or scared or even have your heart broken by someone. Do you resign to fate and decide never again to try? Do we say because my mum had not a good marriage and dad and neighbours are always at war with their spouses we shall not venture to marry? Or shall we say because I proposed and she disposed, never again to try? Shall we say because he came with lip and ate and left not buying, never again to sell? Or shall we say because dad had not a school climate of rosy and cosy life, never again to school? Or shall we say because one died in first year “unquized”, never again to school? Or shall we say because we took a course, sat an exam and failed or perhaps had some papers referred, never again to try? Or shall we say because I had a poor grade in a lecturer’s course; never again to take his or her course? Or shall we say because I sat some papers and had it all devils on the cross; we shall not strive to destroy the Ds? Or shall we say because we try to learn an instrument and failed, never to learn to sing or play a flute? Indeed! It is according to the contours of the old ropes that we build new ones, but if an earlier wine tasted sour, is that an excuse never to taste another? Or shall we say because we sponsored ten students to school and they all left the church never again to help our youth? Tell me, shall we say because we voted several times and not had what we wanted, never again to vote? Are there not different weather conditions every time? Bro., are there not times when it is super cold and the blanket pinches as pin and times when the sun burns like fire? Are there not times in life when the weather is fair and cool when we wished it were same all day? Ah! Are there not times when the moon disappears at night, the stars give way and it rains anyway? Are there not times, ladies and gentlemen even in the day when darkness falls? Have we not experienced rain while yet the sun shone as bright? Dearest dear, such and such is life! Why then do we nag and complain and curse and blame God, throwing in the towel, losing hope and calling it quits? To say “kekrereke yen boo bio”x3 when things go wrong, ladies and gentlemen, is a sign of immaturity. Why can’t we still hope in God and trust Him to do as He’s said, trying as many times as we may to change lives rather than resigning to fate and saying “kekrereke men boo bio!” Date composed: wed, 31/10/12 Franz kafta told the story of a hungry, jobless young man who stood behind a kingdom gate hoping to enter. He watched the door keeper for a long time like a stray goat spying on a cassava dough seller. This man wandered how he could get past the gateman who also had blatantly refused to look in his direction. He plotted and strategized, schemed and planned but was afraid to try. He remembered all the motivational messages he’d listened to, he recollected all the books he read on trying, but was afraid to try, he finally gave up the struggle, tired, disappointed and disillusioned. As he was dying, he lamented to the gatekeeper: why, why did you keep me out? The gateman replied: I did not keep you out. This is your door, and I am only here to serve you. Still not ok, the young man angrily retorted, why then did you stand in my way? The gateman again replied, I didn’t, I’d have been more than glad to let you in but you never asked to enter. This man died a foolish and miserable death out of hunger when there was free compulsory capitation grant, feeding just a minute walk away from him but fear, doubt, unbelief and that grasshopper mentality kept him outside till he died. The tragedy of the unseized moments. A beautiful young virgin had roamed the whole earth in search of a husband, had prayed all the prayers, done all the psychology and obeyed all the counseling, yet found no suitor. Disappointed she turns to God and confessed that she was tired and that any man who came her way at the time would she agree to. Unknown to her was the numerous suitors she had who could not seize any of the dramatic moments to express their love for her. One of her numerous suitors Arthur had also roamed, prayed and called on God and done all, even more than the virgin did , only to resign to faith quit while he met the virgin almost every day on his way to work. Another young man Richmond met this virgin for once and immediately his heart jumped up, he came back in a minute, commented on the attractiveness of the virgin’s hair and the flower on her dress and O! the battle had been won. That young man watched the episode sadly and disappointingly from afar while the virgin Grace followed Richmond to his home. The tragedy of the unseized moments. The worst thing that will ever happen to you is your inability to tell people you love that you love them until you lose them. Do your friends, male/females have any good character, why not appreciate it now that you have them around you? Have you got a morsel of food, why not share with your friends while he is alive with you? You have Christ and happiness? Why not share with people while you have them around you? “Men never realize the worth of others till they lose them” May this never apply to you. Do not hate anyone because of any difference. Love as much as you can, care as much as you can, share as much as you can. Do not wait for a friend to pass away before you say had I known, I’d have loved him more. Appreciate people while yet you have them for you may meet someone today and not the next day. When I moved to campus after becoming the hall chaplain for the biggest hall in the university of education Winneba, Ghartey hall, I expected to share room with the honourable council member Mr. Okra Ammanor but he did not turn up in time so a level hundred student was put in his place. I went down with him the very moment to the next block to help him convey his luggage to the last floor GTF28 where I lodged. I sat him down after packing and conveying his things: I took the very heaviest of them all, after which I sat him down to relate to him how many people I’d counseled with related roommate problems as is mostly the case in any human institution where two or more people happen to be living together. I told him of how we were different and from different backgrounds, temperaments and psychological make ups and different experiences and ideologies of life. He listened with attentive ears and concern, I swept the room all the time, he would cook and sprinkle oil on my bed sheet, I’d wash them without compliant, he’d wake up early and play noisy, worldly music which evidently does not befit my office as the hall chaplain, and which he knew I personally hated because I’d told him several times, he would sharpen pencils in the room, cook and untidy the place and leave all upswept, till I do it, and at midnight as late as twelve, my brother would be cooking and I couldnt sleep, yet amidst all these I sent a message to radio windy bay that he was the best roommate. I left him to arrange his things as he wanted, though they blocked the way, I entreated him to go to church which he wouldn’t do, I called him to morning devotion, to which he’d bawl at me; “I’m not that religious ooo why are you forcing things on me?” I lived with this brother of mine in fear, reverence and care, afraid of hurting his feelings, afraid of offending him, afraid of sitting on his happiness and afraid of infringing on his rights. I gave up all effort on helping him, I relented every effort aimed at helping a brother or even to comment on any action of his, rather, I left him to do as he pleased. On the day of his matriculation, Saturday 29th September 2012, I left for the reading room with a brother’s laptop to research for my next book INDELLIBLE PRINTS while he was still in bed, which was usual of him on Saturdays. I returned in the evening at about17hrs GMT, which is about 5pm in Ghana, he wasn’t in the room, at about 6pm I left to see brother John Jackson, a co youth leader from Tema who had come to occupy my former place in the church store, returning around 22HRS GMT only to be greeted with the saddest news of the moment, brother Francis has been rushed to the hospital after collapsing in a friend’s room about an hour ago. Little did I know that that was the end of the life story of my first roommate that I ever had while staying on campus. I cried, I wept, jumped up and down in despair and shock. What made me weep more is the fact that I warned him several times, I even went to the extent of writing and pasting a warning notice on the door post as well as many other doors, this he reported to his sister who is married to a lecturer that I was intimidating him. I heard this after his death. The point is this: I tried my best to help him realize that survival on campus was not by fitness, but by leaning on the everlasting arms of God, though he didn’t appreciate it, I didn’t disrespect him, but to the best of my ability, I respected him and treated him as a senior brother though I didn’t know his age and it didn’t look like he was older than me but I appreciated him while yet he was with me. Many co executive members advised that I report him to the president but I knew the consequence of that, his image would have been distorted and he would have been moved from the room. So I refused to let the president know. Real fulfillment is in helping others to live a better life. Before brother Philip Worwui died in level 200, I was with him every morning during his illness, I did all I could for him, we prayed, we sung together, we listened to songs and messages together on his laptop, some days before he left the school to the house, Regina Bilekyi and I visited him, he insisted that he brought us bread for us to take in some tea before we left, though we opposed to taking that tea, brother Philip, as was his nature to be generous, ensured that we took that tea before we left him. That was his life! He gave! He shared! He cared! Another day I had absolutely nothing on me. No money, no food, not even a little gari did I find in my things to keep me going. You may be surprised but it happened! Eventually the spirit led me to bro. Philip’s end. I could not ask him for transport to the north campus to attend my lecture but he fed me with the little that was left in his room. He did his best; he gave of his best to those who needed it. I submitted his last assignment before he departed to the house for treatment but never came back. We were at the liberation square evangelizing the matriculants when the news came that brother Philip whom I affectionately called Prof Worwui was gone never to return!!! I lost a great compatriot, advisor and friend, one who knew how to seize the moments to do good to people. MAY HIS SOUL REST IN THE BOSSOM OF HIS FATHER WHOM HE BELIEVED SO MUCH. Has it ever dawned on your sub conscious being that you won’t have people around you forever? Have you ever realized that you can’t have someone all day every time? Why not love them while you have them? Why not just tolerate that friend for now because we won’t have them around for ever? Think about it, if you have a grudge with or hatred against someone and without sorting and ironing out your differences, one party dies, how’d you feel? Settle that grievance before it becomes too late Some years ago in south America, a crew of Peruvian Sailors cruising up the Amazon river came across a weird spectacle: a Spanish ship was at anchor in the middle of the wide Amazon and all the sailors were stretched out weakly on the deck of the ship. As the Peruvians drew nearer, they saw that the Spanish were in a terrible physical condition. They looked like death itself, they were weak beyond description, their lips perched and swollen. They were literally dying of thirst “Can we help you?” the Peruvians shouted. In response, the Spaniards shouted “WATER!!!” “WATER!!!” “WATER!!!” “We need fresh water” the Peruvian sailors, surprised at such a request, told them to lower their buckets and help themselves. How could you be swimming in fresh water and be crying for potable water!!! Fear, doubt, apathy! They never tried but were so much afraid. That is what I call The tragedy of the unseized moments. The Spanish thought they were lost in the open ocean, that the water around them was undrinkable so they had given up hope, they quit trying, they just dropped anchor and waited helplessly to die of thirst. They had anchored in the middle of fresh water for days yet didn’t know it. They had not discovered it because they had quit trying. Did you say they are unwise? That how could they conclude that the river was undrinkable when they had not tasted of it? When you met that that Rasta brother smoking, did you not say in your mind that he wouldn’t listen to you if you spoke to him? When you met that worldly dancer, did you not say he was a sinner so i’d have nothing to do with him, did you not say that Muslims are not Christians you can’t talk to them, did you not blacklist that brother and decided not to do business with him because you said he wasn’t a Christian, have you not decided never to enter into marriage because you have once been in a relationship which wrecked on the way? Have you tasted the new once? How about you who have said in your heart never to marry or have anything to do with a particular tribe just because another member of that tribe treated you badly? Did you also not say that a member of that church did not live well with us so I will never visit that church? How then do you draw your conclusion so fast, so often, so abruptly without a try? That is the tragedy of the unseized moments that we all find ourselves in. Keep on calling until your voice is heard One problem that runs through all these examples above is the problem of apathy; quitting on life. The opposite of faith, contrary to hope, antonym of love, it is the other side of commitment; to be spiritless, heartless, sluggish, numb, paralysed, insensitive, unconcerned, unimpressed, unexcited, unmoved, unstirred, untouched, demotivated. Apathy is a tragedy. If I were unconcerned about anything, I’d really be upset about apathy. We all dread the thought of failure. Indeed failure is bad but worst than failure is not trying at all. Not trying at all is tantamount to apathy. It is the worst of all failures. It is better to try and fail than to remain unmoved. After all if you fall you can rise again it is when you remain there that is bad. As someone noted “you drown in a river not by falling into it but remaining there in.” Apathy, giving up on a task as a result of discouragement is a grave tragedy! Do your best to avoid it. The tragedy of life is that many people reach the point of death only to realise that they had never really lived. Once you’ve love no one, cared for no one, sacrificed for none, you’ve never lived! Once you’ve failed to try, failed to venture, failed to risk, you’ve lost it all. It would have been better if you had not lived at all. The tragedy of life is not that we die but that things die in men while yet the live. Somewhere along the way of life, someone might have hurt you or scared, or disappointed you. Do you resign to faith and decide not to try again? Do we just say because my mother did not have a good marriage, my mum is always at war with Dad, I’m never going into marriage? Or shall we say because Dad did not have a successful life at school, I’m also not going to try? Shall we say because someone died in university at first year we shall not attend university? Or shall we say because we wrote WASSCE and failed some papers, or wrote a university or tertiary exams and was referred in a course, we shall not attend school again? Shall we say because we tried learning violin or clarinet or organ and failed we shall not learn to sing or to play the guitar too? It is true that we build according to the contours of the old as postulated by an Anlo proverb but if an earlier wine was bitter does that prevent us from tasting another? Or shall we say because we sponsored ten youths to school and the all left the church we shall not offer help to our students? Don’t be terrified by the risks, pressures and demands of life, don’t run away from commitment, and don’t pull back into your shelves and hide giving up on life. Keep on striking and digging! You will soon hit gold. Are there not different weather conditions all the time? Are there not times when it rains and the sun scorches like fire? Are there not times when the weather is fair and cool and we wish it remained the same? And are there not times when the moon disappears at night and the stars give way? Are there not times even in the day when darkness falls? Have we not experienced rain while the sun shone? Such is life! We cannot use past experiences as excuses for not trying at all. Why then do we nag and complain and lose hope giving up on life and throwing in the towel and calling it an end? Can’t we still hope in God and work for changes in our lives by trying as many times as we can? Let us rise to the call of life and work assiduously to change our plights for better. We cannot use past experiences as excuses for not trying new ones. The world is waiting for you to make a hit! Don’t let anyone decide for you when to strike or when to speak. Make the best out of what you have now! There is a place for you at the top! EPISODE TWO APPRECIATE WHAT YOU HAVE. JESUS Christ told the story of a business man who decided to take a trip, left his fortune with three men, upon his return, he calls his three business associates for a report. The first two who had made good use of the money by investing it, were commended for a job well done. The third that had been afraid of trying, not only missed out on a promotion, but lost all the money too. He failed because he didn’t appreciate what he had. Why didn’t I get as much as the others? Why do I always have to be given the least? This is not fair! How do you expect me to compete with them? How? Why? Ok. Fine. I know what to do. I’m not going to play the game anymore. I’ll show them! I won’t participate at all in the game. He is full of apathy and ingratitude. He didn’t appreciate what he had. Until we begin to appreciate what we have, until we realise that this is what God believes we can succeed with, there is no way we are going to make progress. We shall remain numb, unmoved, demotivated, unexcited, paralysed and unable to reach our full stretch. Look, there is far too much that you can do with your life regardless of where you are! There is far too much you can offer this world. Read wide, read good books and explore. You can go far, the world stands aside to let them pass who know where they are going. Appreciate what you have now, thank God for it and work to improve it. When I was taken from class four in a school that had just started: Graceland international in Tema to JSS one in Leonardo Junior School, a very high profile school in Tema noted for its academic excellence, I had to compete with pupils who had been promoted from class six, with a difference of two years experience! Yet I didn’t run away from there, by God’s grace I even toped them all in RME as well as a splendid performance in other subject areas except mathematics which had been my problem since primary, even there I didn’t fail!!. I was selected to participate in a quiz competition between forms one, two and three, yet we beat the form twos (A n B) and form 1A with a very minimal margin behind 3A. I was then in form 1B after I’d been moved from 1A. Aside, these were children of very wealthy parents, my case wasn’t so. I had to go home every now and then because of school fees. My sister Dora who was then caring for my fees was also in school, bro Dan too was in school, sister Ruth was also in school, sister Gladys who was given a sewing machine to help me in my daily pocket money never gave me any money! I had to sell “agbeli kanklo” every Saturday and public holidays and charcoal in the evenings after school (when my mates were having extra and special tutoring in their homes) for my mum to keep us going. I didn’t complain that I was being treated unfairly though at certain times I get discouraged, desperate and extremely worried, I didn’t give up. There were times I cried, I wept, I grudged and sometimes refused to go to sell but it all taught me lessons. Who knew that I could also make it to the secondary school let alone talk of vas? Be content with your current endowments and work towards a better future and not resign to fate and say I shall not participate any longer. Appreciate what you have. If you think your wife is not good for you, just leave for three days. I promise you, you will come to find another man proposing to occupy your vacated position. There are thousands of people just waiting for you to quit so they can come for your port folio. You think your job is bad? Go elsewhere and see if someone else would not come for it. Did you say you have no nice shirts? Remove the one on you and throw it away and see if someone else wouldn’t come for it. You don’t like the school you’ve been admitted to? There are thousands out there waiting to be called! Just quit now! Quit and you’ll realise how foolish and senseless, sorry to say you had been. JUST QUIT OK? QUIT!!! There are thousands of people just waiting for you to quit so they can come for your port folio. A farmer wanted to sell off his farmland and home because he thought he’d been there for far too long, so desired a new and “better” place so he sent for and enlisted the service of an estate agent to draw up an advert to be placed in the news papers. After preparing the ad, the agent read these words to the farmer: beautiful farmhouse, ideal location, excellent barn, good pasture, fertile soil, up to date equipment, well bred stock, near town, near church, near school, good neighbours....” “Wait a minute! Can you go over that again?” after a second reading, the farmer exclaimed “I’ve changed my mind! I’ve been looking for a place like this all my life!” How many times in our lives do we stop to count the amount of blessings we have around us before we complain? Do we ever realise the worth of things while yet we have them? Do we value and appreciate things while yet we have them? Do we make good use of the little that we have or we just sit down and fold our arms all the time crying; the leader, the leader, and the leaders! Someone else!!! This farmer was living in the paradise he’d for years desired to live in but never saw it because such is natural of humans, once the thing is close to us, we never see the good sides until we lose them! I drew up the programme outline for “WORSHIP THE LORD IN THE BEAUTY OF HOLLINESS”, a programme the Lord asked me to organise on campus in front of Ghartey Hall block B, a sister took this programme and all that she was looking out for, was what I didn’t do well and what I should have done her way! She complained my arrangement was bad! I agreed to what she said but that I’d already printed. Yet this programme was to be the talk of the day for weeks! The very arrangements she said was bad, was what others praised! It is better to listen to God than to listen to the selfish and egoistic critics of men. Why don’t we look out for reasons why this can be possible rather than condemn and damn everything? I have personally resolved never to refuse speech to anyone because of his or her character. If I think your character wouldn’t help you, I befriend you and try to introduce to you what I think. If you see any sanity in what I say and decide to go by it, fair, if not, I have saved my soul, period! Never under estimate anyone. Everyone I meet is in a way superior to me because I learn new things from them all. Appreciate what you have while you have it with you. Accept the fact that certain things at certain points in life cannot be changed. All the bitterness, nagging and sentiments in life cannot change the fact that the businessman in the story above had one talent, and his was smaller as compared to the others. That’s what he was given and he had no say in it! So also all the bitterness, nagging and sentiments in life cannot change the fact that I was poorer than all those children in LEOJUSCO, that they had better learning opportunities than I did cannot be disputed! That is what I was given and I had no option. Life has limits and we must learn to accept them: Adam and Eve had their own limitations; they could eat of everything in the Garden of Eden except the tree of life. We are not God! Only God has no limitations. We cannot call back evil words, slanderous words spoken about people, we cannot change our past, we can’t change the ageing process, and we cannot eliminate death. A mother can’t impregnate but the father does. How do we react to these “trees in the midst of our gardens that we cannot and must not eat?” people waste time running away from these ‘trees?’ They keep saying if this were that, if I were a little taller, if I were a little fairer, if that were this and so on! A young man who did not learn how to cook goes to vas and would cook today somehow good, tomorrow bad, the next, bad, the next medium and another worst! Whenever he cooks bad food, he either says the rice was not a good specie, or another time it was the burner, the next time he forgot to do this or that! If I were a little taller or if I were a little fairer. If not that I’m dark, if I were a lawyer instead of a teacher, if I were born in that family, or if I had this or that! WHY??????? HE SIMPLY could not learn to do it. Probably he kept telling himself “I’ll try tomorrow if I can do something” and that was it. He kept procrastinating till it was too late for him to do something. Here is a poem you can relate to: Remember the day I borrowed your car and dented it? I thought you’d kill me, but you didn’t. You remember the day I dragged you to the beach and you said it would rain and it did? I thought you’d say I told you so! But you didn’t. You remember the day I flirted with all the guys to make you jealous and you were? I thought you’d leave me but you didn’t. You remember the time I spilled strawberry pie all over your car rug? I thought you’d hit me but you didn’t. You remember the time I forgot to tell you the dance was formal and you turned up in jeans? I thought you’d drop me but you didn’t. Yes! There were lots of things you didn’t do but you put up with me and you loved me and protected me. There were lots of things I wanted to make up to you when you returned from Vietnam. But you didn’t. The point is clear! We don’t realise the essence of people until we lose them! Do it NOW!! All the I love you’s that you’ve not said, all the I’m sorry not said, all the thank you not said...SAY THEM NOW. We have no time. If you have a broken relationship that ought to be mended, don’t let the sun go down! DO IT NOW! You have something you should be doing, CARPE DIEM! Seize the moments. DO IT NOW!!!! KILL IT NOW!!!. EPISODE THREE LET’S KILL SOMEONE ELSE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isn’t it interesting, when someone goes wrong, one of the first things we want to do is to find someone else to blame it on. Take the case of Asamoah Gyan’s world cup penalty miss. Moments ago, this was Ghana’s hero, fastest goal scorer in the Germany 2006, he was celebrated and became the talk of the year but when he missed that penalty shoot out, he became the enemy of Ghanaians. They insulted, cursed, complained and blamed the failure on Gyan, meanwhile the match was to end immediately, goalless! Hence, Gyan’s missing of the penalty, couldn’t have been a problem since it was all the same as not having the penalty kick at all yet they complained and insulted to the discomfort of this young man. I really like Gyan’s response; the next moment he was in a recording studio with castro. While he was thinking of what next to do with his life, the visionless and shallow minded were gathering in there caucuses to gossip and play their blame games. Years before him, Sammy Kuffour was Ghana’s number one defender! There was no match Ghana could play without him. He was celebrated, cheered, and carried everywhere but upon allowing a ball to by pass him in a match, he was insulted and blacklisted, tongue lashed and whipped until he called it quits. He resigned from international football just because of this let’s blame someone else syndrome. It is time we kill someone else now and face the real problem at stake and get a solution than look for someone else to blame it on. Look at the Israelites at the bank of the red sea, upon seeing Pharaoh’s army with full vim and anger marching and gallivanting towards them, they immediately run on Moses who moments ago, was their hero, their redeemer, their conqueror! But now when trouble reared its head, they went for the jugular: It’s your entire fault, a fine mess you got us into! Why did we even listen to you? You are to blame for this. It’s you Moses! Another turns the left finger, another turns the right and they all castigate Moses for causing them pain. When my campus fellowship was to host a programme at the south campus, I was the secretary to the planning committee, we delayed in the arrangement of accommodation for the brothers from Cape Coast until about three days to the programme before I was to write and submit a letter to the Ghartey hall finance manager for accommodation for these brethren. Upon submitting the letter, he complained that we were late but in the letter, I indicated that we knew that we were late and that he had the choice to deny us a place for our own people but since the milk is spilt already, he should just help us out and we would work on ourselves next time! This was an idea I gathered from Dale Carnegie’s how to win friends and influence people” he accepted not only to give us the place but to also subsidise the amount for us. We knew we caused the problem and the best thing was to admit being wrong and move on. When we accept responsibility for our own actions and lives, our communities will help us, our church, our families, our people and God will help us. LET’S KILL SOME ONE ELSE NOW AND START TAKING RESPONSIBILTY FOR OUR OWN LIVES. MOSES HAD a kind of never say die spirit though caught up between Pharaoh’s furious cavalry and the red sea, he did not call it quits, he didn’t throw in the towel, no he trusted God and went and went forward. He didn’t have all the answers but stayed in communication with God. He did go forward, he did trust in God, he did his best, he didn’t quit so why should i? When Moses and the children of Israel got to the Red sea, God didn’t lead them around or over, or under the sea, He led them through it. when we face the trials and difficult times of life and all seem to go from worse to worst, when the noises of life seem to bash on our doors and the warriors from the Vietnam war are singing dzadza ko dza kodzacommando gb)na lo’ when it seems as though all the worries wears and tears of life were discovered for us alone, when we seem not to know which direction to go, trust and look to Him. He will carry you through. Go, go through it! strive, fight on fight NOW! And have a tale to tell tomorrow. Go, go through it. Don’t wait looking for someone else to blame it on. Someone else has been killed, buried and gone! Look up to God. He alone has the solution to life’s worries. I hope and pray that when troubles and challenges come your way, you will remember Moses at the Red sea and strengthened by that, you will move forward trusting God to be with you and bring you safely through it to the end. When our hearts are broken, when we walk through the grief valley, how does God bring us healing? I don’t want to be morbid or sensational or overly emotional, but I’d like to be very personal, i am thinking about my own recent experience with shame and longfacedness. When I partook in that WHAT DO YOU KNOW QUIZ on GTV and GBC radio stations across the country I didn’t get even a single point! I just went blank, everything went empty, zero, as though I had not read anything about MAY DAY or the trades unions congress TUC, I didn’t answer even a single question! I kept saying pass it on and Dan Afari Yeboah, the quiz master, kept making fun of me and was growing furious about the performance. It is the fact that I was the youngest and with the lowest level (200) while others were 400 and 500 medical students and all that but that is no excuse! Someone said ‘you didn’t pray’ I smiled because I hardly do anything without praying. I scored zero. Back on campus, everybody heard of the mess and it was not easy. Everywhere, the name of Agbenyo spread with shame and disgrace. My closest associates did not want me anymore because if i passed by Ghartey Hall, anywhere, people threw sachet water, cooking pot covers and all sorts against me. A preacher of the gospel, a defender of the truth, a well known and reputed evangelist, I became the scorn of the whole campus. Everybody laughed at me! I normally say halleluuuuuuuuuuia when I came around. They have now turned it to agbeluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuia. I couldn’t learn, concentrate, do anything, I had to run away! My mum was seriously sick the same time and was dying! I had to go home; two troubles one god! Same time, news came that my sister Florence had passed away. It was as if the gates of hell had been opened on me. Prior to all these, I had a dream in which my mum died and everyone left me alone! To struggle with life but my mum didn’t die. It was shame that was on the way. In another dream, I dreamed that I was naked before the whole world I said Oh Lord your will be done. All these happened level 200 second semester 2012. I came to school in level 300 first semesters only to hear that I had been referred in teaching English. I quickly rushed to the lecturer which was not my practice when I have a discontent with any grade, but all effort and prayer proved futile, it didn’t work like that of the curriculum where the B I didn’t like turned to A. This time it was permanent and Mrs Sakyiama Antiri refused to do anything about the result though she admitted that she didn’t mark well. I cried, I wept, and I asked God why? I wept sore but nothing changed. I am to write that paper again. A well known figure coming for a re-write---only God knows how it feels. Needless to say that Agbenyo is the most popular figure at the south campus, this same 2012 first semester, my roommate died and I had several condemnations from the family. They threatened to imprison me; they insulted and created a black image of the boy! But it was not new to me so I kept quiet through it all and never uttered a single word. But now as I write, the first semester (300) has not ended but is almost done with the writing of three strong books for publication! The Agbeluuuuuuuuuuia that was a form of scorn and shame has now turned to fame and everyone wants to shake a hand with agbeluuuuuuuuuuuuuuia. My best critics are now my best friends and admirers and they wish they were like me. People now are ready even to lie down to defend this little boy. TO GOD IS THE GLORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRIEF, pain, shame and awful experiences. It hurts! It is an intense feeling of loss and agonising experience of separation from someone you have loved so much! To lose your reputation, you’re hard earned reputation. Probably you are a man of God and a small girl has caused you to sin and it has come to the public domain. If this happens to you, if you aren’t a strong man with muscles and blood, you will kill yourselves! But should we stop living because of problems? Its painful! I know you didn’t intend to do something like that. Who on earth wants to tarnish his hard earned image just like that? But things happen to men that remain a mystery even to us all yet we don’t kill ourselves. WE CONTINUE TO LIVE! May be you have promised not to break your virginity until you are married but then you have done otherwise, don’t lose faith, don’t lose hope, you may weep, weep, weep, weep it out and cry out loud and grieve alone somewhere. It is a therapy; it cleans your heart of all the pain. Grief is the by product of love and as we always say, it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Yet there is much more to learn from grief and pain I walked a mile with sorrow and never a word said she. But o! The things I learnt from her when sorrow walked with me. -Robert Browning Hamilton Life is in stages and there are stopovers and obstacles. Let’s take for instance that I want to go to my hometown Dzita Agbledome and Anyanui where our family is based, from Tema, I’d have to go through various communities on the way, I’d have to get to the motor way round about, all the way to Dabala, Keta, Anloga... on and on till I get to Dzita, through to Agbledome then to Anyanui eventually. Supposing I stopped at Dzita(my dad’s hometown) where no one knows me neither do I know anyone, I wouldn’t get to Anyanui or if I stopped at Keta I’d have ended up elsewhere and not my family base. We need to understand that some of these circumstances are stopovers, we need not spend time thinking of these stopovers because we are dealing with time for time is money. In spite of all the obstacles, move forward! CARPE DIEM!!! THERE are times we need to weep them out, cry it out and pray it out loud. There are times when we need to be left alone to think it over and get over it. You need to ponder and advise yourself, another is the period of questioning; why this happened? Why me? Why did I not leave a minute earlier or an hour later? You may feel guilty, why did I not visit them? Why didn’t I pray so much on that paper? Why did I over look that action? Why didn’t I say I love you, am sorry, you are good, are you born again? Do you have Christ? It’s a moment of guilt when you know the situation now cannot be corrected. Finally we gain the strength to go on with life. Your ability to go on after a loss of a dear one is the finest tribute you can pay that dear one. Grief is a journey and journeys take time. We move through the valley, back to the mountains and forth to the plains and all the places of life, God anoints us in His own ways. In His own time, with the balm of healing from Gilead. Brethren, we need to keep up on all relations. Friends acquaintances and associates, our family, our parents, our brothers and our sisters. We need to keep up to date on our relations with our church and with God. We must go forward. When someone we love dies, we must go forward! Life is like a bicycle, the only way to stay balanced is to keep going forward1 if you stand still, you will topple over and fall, if you rest, you’ll rust, if you rash too you’d crash so just keep going to maintain your balance. When Jesus healed people, he mostly said; go your way your faith has made you whole” all he was saying is this; “go on with life, I’ll go with you and as you go, your faith will make you whole.” If you don’t go you won’t be whole! So next time when trouble crops up, face it! Don’t look for someone else to blame it on because they are all dead and gone and you are the only one left to do the work so what can I do? The prayers of Saint Francis of Assisi Lord makes me an instrument of thy peace. Where there is hatred, let me show love; where there is injury, pardon. Where there is doubt; faith. Where there is despair, hope. Where there is darkness; light. Where there is sadness; joy. O! Divine master, grant that I may not so seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand. To be loved as to love, for it’s in giving that we receive, it is in pardon that we are pardoned; it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. So my dear, let’s kill someone else NOW! And start to live as if we alone must do for others. Summing up, If you are a student, the exams will be written by no one else but you! You got to prepare your mind for it, get ready for it, you cant blame anyone for your failure if it does happen, cover your topics, solve the past questions stop the gossip and aimless visits. You can go to the beach as many times as possible after passing your exams. You can visit and go on excursions as many times as possible, you can marry as many women as possible if you so desire after your most important aspects are tackled. If you are a teacher, work on your exercise books, mark them, save time! Time is not renewable! We don’t have extra time. If you have books to write, kill it now, if you have sponsors to seek, kill it now, if you have publications to do, kill it now! Have you got a soul to save, now is the time, clean that room now! Buy it now, save now, type now, pray now. Whatever you have to kill, please kill it now. May be you are sleeping too much. May be you are playing too much, may be you are resting too much. Maybe you have waited too long. Maybe you have looked down on yourself too much, maybe you are looking too much up to others. We don’t have much time. There is a lot God has deposited in you that you need to give the world. Don’t spend all your time watching videos and playing games. Those you are watching have put their best into what you are watching. Its time for you to be watched too. RISE UP AND SHOW YOUR WORTH!!!