HOW TO DEAL WITH SIBLING RIVALRY

HOW TO DESTROY SIBLING RIVALRY Sibling rivalry is the kind of resentment/hatred siblings feel towards each other when one feels that the other is having preferential trade opportunities at home. . It is expected, especially in Africa where even your distant relatives are seen as your brothers and sisters, that siblings cling tightly to each other no matter the situation, However, where there is rivalry, SIBLINGS CAN BECOME ENEMIES. Siblings are the immediate family a man thinks of before anyone else, yet the canker of sibling rivalry has set many a hitherto peaceful family ablaze. I don't want to sound morbid, overly sensational or too personal, but it would interest you to know what things I have suffered in the hands of my senior siblings because I've been the favourite of my mum. A very good friend last asked me after listening to my story; he said, I THOUGHT YOU EWES ARE VERY GOOD AT FAMILY BONDING? Yes! That's a universal truth but sibling rivalry knows no tribe! Its just as ubiquitous as mosquitoes! Do you remember how Joseph's siblings hated him to the point of even selling him off into a foreign land all because THEIR FATHER LOVED HIM MORE? That is the result we get when parents seem to overtly love one chilld more than all their other children. Probably, you are the one being hated by other siblings; they are never ready to help you, they always scold you for any little mistake, they always try to "bulley" or cow you into submission. No amount of good you do appeals to them. You have become rivals with your siblings competing fo the love and attention of your parents. Its just like a man in love with a girl and seeing that girl always with another person. Its painful, right? Well, it's just the same in this case. Sibling rivalry is a great problem that needs to be tackled in all homes. Sometimes, it sadly grows even into old age where siblings dont talk to each other, no visits, no calls, no love for eachother. Just resentment and hatred till hell. Since its a mother's day, I dedicate this piece to my mum Madam Grace Aku Amegah, my wife, (maybe to be) and all other godly women who are impacting lives. I LOVE YOU! NOW How do we handle this? 1. Parents should avoid buying gifts for one child, ignoring or neglecting all the others. 2. Parents should avoid always sending one particular child only. 3. Parents should avoid scolding or beating one particular child all the time while shielding the other from punishment. 4. Parents should be fair in heaping praises and distributing gifts. 5. Stop comparing your children to others. They are unique in their own ways. 6. Avoid using words like useless, dumb, good for nothing, old man! Block headed etc. 7. Praise your children often, and encourage them with laughter and love at home. 8. Settle disagreements between kids fairly. Don't take sides. 9. When they bring their result home from school, be wise in drawing comparisons. 10. Love your children unconditionally and don't let them take your attention from your husband!!! HE WOULD FEEL JEALOUS TOO!!! NOW CHILDREN Children must understand that some people would always be better than others; life is not a competition. Children should learn to take joy in the happiness of the other. Learn to share what you have with your siblings; if its an award you had in school and your senior brother didn't perform well there, don't tease and laugh at him but rather make him feel part of the glory. If its a gift you got from someone for running errands or something, bring it home and share with your siblings. When every child is taught to love and appreciate the efforts of others, rivalry can be brought to the lowest end. WHAT IS THE FEELING OF RIVALRY LIKE IN YOUR AREA, WHAT BETTER WAYS CAN WE TACKLE SIBLING RIVALRY? SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON MY FACEBOOK WALL. AT AGBENYO EBENEZER YAO OH GIVE US HOMES BUILT FIRM UPON JESUS. Ë YAO AGBENYO LIFE/CAREER COACH +233543556235 CEO, YAFinc.